This post is for those who fall mid to low on the percentiles. Low to average MCAT managing zero publications during your academic career. Maybe your GPA doesn't scream at you (AAAAAA... get it?) Heck maybe you don't even make it to the 25th percentile on your school lists. Maybe you don't even have an interview to your name.

Give up.

Give up on your dreams of being a doctor. Find something else. Fulfill your life some other way.

I'm being serious. Whatever you're feeling right now is raw truth.

I would hope you felt denial, anger, sadness, maybe some guilt.

Some of you maybe some relief.

What I truly hope, was your initial gut reaction was "Hell no".

I was that student.

I failed gen chem twice. Ochem once. Barely passed biology. I spent 3 years in a research lab with no publications. My MCAT score is truly nothing outstanding. I dropped my major early in my academic career. I truly gave up on my dreams of becoming a doctor. I felt frustrated going from acing every exam in highschool to utterly scraping by whilst others made it look easy. I felt a hole in my heart when people talked about their research or their MCAT scores or their GPA. They felt so utterly devastated with a 511 where I barely scraped a low 500. I remember angrily scraping toilets after my classes wondering why I'm working so hard if my efforts were reduced to spinning my wheels in the mud.

After a failed anatomy practical I did just that. I gave up.

I felt miserable. For weeks. I researched ways to pivot. I had done some social work before so I began working in that. Through a lab mate I learned about medical laboratory sciences so I thought why not. I still love the science and I knew there was a career there. Maybe I can do both!

I worked in the field of social work and worked as a med tech. I loved to help people. I loved the science. I love laboratory medicine. However, deep in my heart and soul something felt off. I never told anyone in my circle I gave up pre-med. That's when my close friend asked, "How's medical school going? Did you give up yet or still trucking on?". In my head I said yes, there's now way to recover my GPA. There's no way. There's no wa-

"Yeah man I'm still fighting for the dream"

Why. Why did I lie? Did I lie? The more and more soul searching I did I found there is no other place for me. The self-doubt so many of us have started to creep in. This time, I fought back.

My GPA isn't competitive, whatever I'll figure it out.

My MCAT isn't competitive, well I still fall somewhere within the percentiles so I'll still shoot.

You have no publications, well I still learned a ton in the lab.

There are so many amazing people applying, do you think you're better than them? Kind of a weird thought, but honestly they deserve their spot. I'm happy to potentially associate with fellow like minded folks.

You took a gap year, you're behind the others. Well, I imagine being a doctor at 34 is a lot like being a doctor at 32 so I'll manage.

You won't get in this cycle. I guess there's next cycle huh?

I built my confidence. I built my ego. I remember why I made my mission medicine. I re-grouped and promised to give it a go once again. No matter what setback, no matter what obstacle, no matter what I will live this life knowing I gave it my all. Outside of school, I am still human. I am someone worthwhile and I know someone like me will make it anywhere. Even if it isn't medicine. I. Have. To. Try.

Yesterday I received a phone call. I got in to my #1 choice.

I made this post because there is a huge sentiment of doom and gloom juxtaposed against glory and success in a brutal cycle like this. A lot of survivorship bias in the field, me included. One thing I can say is more than anything is you have to love yourself. You HAVE to believe in yourself. Leave no room for doubt. If there's a weakness, be honest and learn to navigate it. Feel despair, but don't drown in it. Don't listen to anyone outside of your own voice, because that's the one that you're stuck with for the rest of your life. Build a voice that cheers you on. Build a voice that creates motivation. If its really bad, therapy helped me tremendously. I went to my therapist and asked "How can I be a better student?", and we went to work. Cringey enough, I read Blue Lock the manga and redefined what ego means. Would you rather have a striker in front of goal filled with self-doubt or one that 100% believes in themselves to take the shot? Some might call it delusional. I call it self-love. I want a doctor that is confident in their treatments and humble in their interactions, they are not mutually exclusive. I exercised every day and took care of my body and mind so I could be a better student and potential doctor tomorrow. I lived with being okay living without being a doctor. Whether you like it or not, your career in medicine ends. Maybe now. Maybe in two years. Maybe in 20. It ends eventually. So please love yourself outside of your school and grades.

And if you feel relieved giving up medicine, hell with the shame. You got far. You tried it. You can live a full life knowing you gave it your best. Life is so rich with opportunity, explore that relief and find your spark again.

I hope my fellow mid-tiered applicants resonate with this. I hope to see you become a doctor. I hope you give up and live a full life in another field.

Best of luck to all of you. Take care. Love yourself.