For two years, I was a research coordinator in a speciality that I was interested in and had done related undergrad research in.

I should’ve known when the previous coordinator submitted her two weeks notice and dipped. The PI refused to hire another coordinator and made me do the work of at least 3 people. I stuck around because I liked the field and needed the clinical experience. Even though I was hardworking and ran around like a headless chicken and the patients LOVED me, for some reason he didn’t like me. I remember one time he asked me to meet at his office, which was a 2 mile hike from clinic, and then he made me wait an extra 30-min as he finished writing a LOR for an undergrad applying to med school. “It’s so easy when they’re a great student,” he said I had asked him to write a LOR for a research fellowship two months before and asked for opportunities to present and he kept on pushing me off.

I should’ve known, but like a toxic bf, I kept on coming back to him. After two years with him, I felt ready to apply to med school so I asked him if he could write my MD letter. He agreed, I sent him all the info in interfolio in April… may, June, july, August rolled around… no letter. I saw this man every single day.

My mental health was also at an all time low due to the stress of the job. I decided to withdraw my primary application and invented a family emergency to quit my job. I gave a month’s notice and wrote a thank you card expressing gratitude for his mentorship 😭

I finally applied this cycle. I asked a doctor I shadowed for like 3 days to write a letter and they wrote me 3 glowing pages. I was accepted to a few T10/T20 programs. I texted him today to ask him about the residency programs for this specialty and if ranking mattered. I shouldn’t have done it, but I thought hey if I attend his school, I might run into him again.

he left me on read. no congrats, no thumbs up, nothing. the doctor I shadowed for 6 hours years ago said they were excited to be my colleague and connected me with people from the schools I asked about.

Unfortunately, it is likely I will be attending his school due to cost. Today will be the last day that i acknowledge him. I’m writing off this specialty. I’m over it.